/facepalm

i figured, going in, that the gems i could share with you from my haiti trip would pale in comparison to the scrapes i was able to get into during my half-year in india.  this is, after all, only 18 days.  right?  riiiight??

wrong.  i’m still 23 days out from my haiti trip, and already, the dark comedy has begun.

the place that i’ll be working is near a city called cap haitien.  there’s a little airport there serviced by a couple of florida/caribbean puddle jumpers, but otherwise it’s so small that it doesn’t register on orbitz.  looking at flying from portland to cap meant buying a $600 round trip ticket from portland to ft. lauderdale, probably staying the night in ft. lauderdale, and then buying a $600 round trip from ft. lauderdale to cap.  so $600 for the first flight, $100 for a hotel, $600 for the second flight, and $50 for travel insurance.  that’s $1350 folks.  to put that into perspective, it takes me 3 months of internship stipends to make that much money.

the other option was a flight into port-au-prince (pap).  the folks at the clinic where i’m working didn’t suggest flying into pap because haiti is a dangerous place, i don’t speak french creole, and it would require a bit of travel to get to cap.  ….but the ticket from portland to pap was only $500.  total.  when i pointed this out, my contact person said that if pap would truly be a better place to fly into, she’d arrange an airport pickup for $50 each way so I wouldn’t be wandering around haiti alone.  perfect.  done.  $1300 versus $600.  easy peasy.

i’m going to be in haiti with a fellow classmate, and the clinic wanted us to be leaving around the same time, so i bought my ticket to pap being quite careful to align my and fiona’s leave times so that we only required one drop off trip.

done.  the ticket had gone up to $600, but i got it anyway.  i excitedly sent my flight itinerary to the clinic.

cut to one week later.

i get an email from someone at the clinic saying that my flight was arriving in pap far too late to catch the last bus from pap to cap and that i would have to change my ticket (ever tried to change an airline ticket?).  she said i would need to arrive in pap no later than 11am to catch the last bus.

“what do you mean, catch the last bus?” i wrote back.  “you said you’d arranged a pick-up.”

it’s funny how tremendously semantics can fuck everything up.  a “pick-up,” it turns out, is an escort only.  someone from the clinic takes a bus to pap, finds you, and the two of you take a bus back to cap together, which you also have to pay for.  this, of course, means that you have to arrive in pap early enough to catch the last bus out of town.  my arrival was slated for 4:40pm.

“you’ll need to change your ticket.”

like hell, i thought.  i’ll fly into pap as planned, stay in a luxury hotel, and we can do the “pick-up” dance just as planned but one day late.  perfect.

i can do what i want, she says, but she doesn’t recommend staying in pap by myself.  luxury hotel or no.

so, i realize that i’ve gotten myself (at least partially) into this whole mess by not taking this woman’s advice to begin with, though my decision to fly to pap resulted from my genuinely not having $1300.  so this time i decide i’ll put my travel bravery aside, not do the hotel, and call orbitz to see how my flight can be salvaged.

the call to orbitz yielded the following gems:  no my travel insurance wouldn’t cover ticket fee changes, they charge $30 to change a ticket, american airlines charges $200, and i’ll have to pay the difference between the old a new ticket, which is $180.  $410 for a change of plans. oh, and one that includes an overnight stay in the ft. lauderdale airport.

cripes.

soooooooo in the interest of not accidentally fucking up and getting another bad ticket, i correspond with the center.  here’s the change.  is it good?  yes?  should i buy it?  yes?  great!

call orbitz back.  the tickets have sold out in the time that it took me to call back, and the only thing available now is first class.  $60 more. (can you really, in good conscience, drink champagne on a flight to a third world country?)

FINE.  SOLD.  DONE.  $470 added to my $600 ticket and $50 worth of worthless insurance.

see the irony here?  made the cheaper choice.  a series of cock-ups have gotten me almost to the original ticket price to cap.  not quite, but i can see my master plan crumbling.

so i send the new flight details to the center and call it a day.

….cut to 9:00 last night.

email:  so are you going to be staying in a hotel in pap your last night here, because your flight leave time from pap is too early for you to make it by bus from cap?

sooooooooo you’re telling me that the itinerary i sent two weeks ago, the one that we’ve already discussed and fixed on the arrival end, is also bad on the departure end?  this is just now being noticed after i had a chance to make changes and lump it all in with my $470 fee?

“yes,” i say, flabbergasted, exhausted, and utterly done, “i’ll be staying in pap my last night there.”  what on earth’s another $180 for a luxury hotel room???

so, a cheap, quick flight on the 3rd from pwm to pap has turned into leaving august 2nd, flying first class to ft. lauderdale, sleeping on the floor in the ft. lauderdale airport, getting up and flying to pap, meeting someone and taking a 3 hour bus to cap, and then leaving cap a day early via another bus ride, staying in a nicer than necessary hotel in pap, and flying home on the 20th–all for around $1375, $25 more than the original “too expensive” flight would have cost.

universe, i have learned my lesson.

to be continued…

 

 

updates and a new journey

my, how time flies!  it’s been 6 months since i got home from india and started my internship here at the birth house.  there have been ups (i’m catching babies, y’all!) and there have been downs (catch me in person for these stories–don’t want them in print yet!).  i’ve learned a lot about midwifery care and more than i care to have learned about the admin/paper-pushing side of things.  i’ve learned how to be a good teacher and how not to be a bad teacher, and for the first time, i’m really starting to feel like a competent care provider.

these things i know:

i don’t want a birth center.  it’s nice to have an office for visits so you don’t sell your soul for gas money, but the maintenance involved in a center is juuuuuust too much.  have you ever had, after being awake for a few days, to scrub and bleach a bathtub that would comfortably sit 4 adults?  for. the. birds.

i can’t wait to be my own boss.  i’m currently working under two preceptors who are as different as night and day, and let’s just say that makes me feel a bit schizophrenic at times!

i love home birth.  there’s nothing like welcoming a baby into the world in a family’s own space.  we have all the same equipment with us, we don’t have to sanitize the place from top to bottom after the birth, and no one has to put a newborn into a car (tricky when its 15 below outside!). 

being on call is hard.  i’m working at a low volume birth center right now, and although we don’t serve many women, the call time for each momma spans up to 5 weeks.  this means that as soon as i’m off call for one momma, i’m back on it for another one.  i had anticipated being off call right now, but sometimes babies like to come later than we think.  being on call means no red wine, clove cigarettes, or campfires (unless you have time for a shower and a change of clothes to get rid of the woodsmoke smell), and depending on where the birth is happening and whether it’s a first baby (long labor) or second (faster labor) it may mean being tethered to the naples/bridgton area for weeks.

it’s hard to know a midwife.  cancelled plans, missed appointments, things falling through the cracks–that’s what happens when you’re friends with/married to/related to a midwife.  i’ve written a whole blog preemptively apologizing for that.  you just have to get used to it.

this won’t last forever.  i’m sure i’ll learn loads more about myself and my future career in the coming year here at the birth house, but i sure do look forward to the idea of graduating and opening a business of my own.  i’m currently thinking of opening a clinic either in north conway, nh or norway, me, but we shall see!

i love teaching.  as part of my placement here at the birth house, i’ve been able to tutor first, second, and fellow third year campus and community students.  it’s incredibly rewarding, a hell of a lot of fun, and it keeps my on my toes and keeps the material fresh in my mind.  i can’t wait to have my cpm so that i can teach proper classes here at birthwise.

i have opportunities to do big things.  this past april, i had the great honor of being nominated and hired into the position of administrative director of the association of midwifery educators.  it’s a 5-8 hour/wk  job that allows me to help craft resources for educators in my field, and it has introduced me to several powerhouse women who are hellbent on advancing midwifery education.  i feel like i’m standing on the edge of something big at a very exciting time, and i’m thrilled to be along for the ride.

…and to do big things in odd places.  my time in india was life-changing.  i probably won’t go away for that long again, but i do enjoy mixing my love of travel, midwifery, and adventure.  this august, i’m going to work at mamababy haiti for a few weeks.  i’m not bringing my computer with me for a million reasons, but when i get back, i’ll get busy transcribing my notes into new blogs.  it promises to be full of wonder, humor, and horror (again) as even making the travel arrangements has been rather a comedy of errors.  we shall see.

so that’s it for now.  birth in maine,  birth in haiti, more birth in maine, then graduation!

to be continued…